Monday, November 29, 2010

Nov. 29, 2010

Rule#25 in Michael Pollan's Food Rules is Eat Your Colors.

I'm afraid the Thanksgiving meal falls very short of this rule unless Michael is big into the neutral palette.

Mashed potatoes, turkey, stuffing, gravy: off white, linen, ecru and beige.
Even the celery in the stuffing had lost it's green color due to cooking.
I tried a small spoonful of my sister's sweet potatoes and they were delicious, and they were orange.

Besides failing Michael Pollan, I failed home ec.
Yes, I learned this rule in 8th grade. Thank you very much....

But for me the Thanksgiving meal is about tradition and our tradition is to eat all foods that are white...ish....

It's only once a year. The rest of the year I can work on eating the rainbow.

Yesterday I made a lovely, colorful bean salad. It had red peppers and yellow peppers, green onions and red tomatoes, black olives and little tan chick peas.

A tasty, colorful salad.

Michael would be very proud.
I even used organic beans.

woo.

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Nov. 24 2010

Tuesdays weigh in brought a small loss of one pound.

Total since Sept. 7th minus 11.

I would sure like to lose a three pounds by Dec. 7th.
Small goal but herculean when you consider Thanksgiving is here.

My family will be walking in a 5K on Thanksgiving morning.
Wouldn't this be a cool tradition to continue in the years to come.

Well. I guess I should say that AFTER the walk :o)

My goal as I approach the weekend is to make great choices and eat only when I am hungry.

I need to make sure I eat light before the big meal so I am hungry at meal time.

This is key for me.

Oh! And this means taste testing will have to be minimal. Now that I think of it. That will be the challenge!!

I will not love the food more than the company and God.

I will be sensible and eat with thankfulness and joy and control.

Lord, help me!

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Nov. 19, 2010

In which I quote Lou Holtz and Kelly Ripa


Yesterday I was watching Regis and Kelly like I do every morning. Regis' good buddy and hero was
sitting in the audience. Lou, when asked, recited his 'four things' one needs in life.


* First, you have to have something to do.
* The second thing you have to have is someone to love.
* Third, you have to have something to believe in.
* Finally, you have to have something to look forward to.

and as Kelly Ripa so cleverly quipped,


"Someone to blame."


How funny is that? Someone to blame!
Yes. It goes back to the Garden of Eden.
When Eve is caught red-handed she starts blaming all of those around her for taking that apple and biting into it.
Hey! It was food. Now that IS extra interesting in light of where I am going with this.

While I think it is funny and common to blame our flaws on others, I truly do not believe my weight issues are anyone's fault but my own. I sincerely take responsibility for my poundage.

I like to tell my ten year old daughter Katie that it is her fault that I am so chubby because I gained weight with her at the age of 42 and have never been able to lose it. Yes. I said ten year old daughter.
We laugh because we know this is absurd.

There is a pattern. I can see things in my life that led me to overindulge and enjoy lots of food.

When I was born, I as one of my mom's smallest babies. I weighed under seven pounds. I think this worried her, because within months I was round and chubby and beautiful. They called me Booba. I guess the resemblance to a Buddha did not go un-noticed.
This was in the 1950's. Being a chubby baby was consider healthy.
Healthy=good.

No. We were not living on Samoa.
This was Chicago.

As I grew, I grew skinny. Very skinny. I remember stories about not being able to wear skirts because my hips were too slim.
I wore jumpers. Little plaid jumpers. Homemade.

On week I decided I wanted to wear my homemade jumper to school every single day for the whole week.
It was gold and brown wool plaid.
My mother didn't notice and I succeeded.

I had lofty goals as a 4th grader.

(I still would like to wear the same outfit every day for a whole week)

Another goal I had was to eat as much as my father. Now whether this was wise is not up for discussion.
I just remember sitting next to my dad and taking as much as he did.

I can still see the plate.

Roast beef, mashed potatoes and gravy.

I proudly took as much as my father did and I ate it all. Gladly. It was my favorite meal.
And it still is.

My parents thought I was skinny and they thought it was funny that I wanted to eat like my dad.

There was no malice. In hindsight, I may have learned some poor eating habits at the dinner table, but I was skinny, how were they to know I would enjoy eating like a lumberjack for the rest of my life.

The love of eating for taste and socialization continued throughout high school but my physical activity let me get away with murder. I blame cheerleading.
Yes. At 125 pounds I started feeling like a hefty girl. I was a base. Sturdy, muscular, solid enough for the 105 pound girls to climb on. In 1975 if you weighed 130 pounds, you wore a size 11 or even a 13. This was the top of the line. The sizes were
5, 7, 9, 11, 13. So I started feeling like the big, girl. The fat one.

(I happen to know lots of girls who weigh 125-130 and boy have things changed. They wear sizes 2,4,6.)

And so the body-hate and dieting began.

I blame the clothing industry and petite girls.

Off to college I went. I was a dance major at first so I was extremely active.
The food, however, was amazing.
Sophomore year I changed majors and was very lonely and bored and didn't fit in.
I started gaining weight.

Buy the time I left Stephens College for Hillsdale in 1977, I had gained twenty pounds.
At 150 pounds I was curvy. I am 5'6" after all, but I was admittedly 20 overweight.

I helped the cheerleaders at Hillsdale with their routines and taught them cheers,
but I was too self conscious about my weight to try out.

I blame....
I blame...
I blame...

Who can I blame for this?

The skinny chicks. That's who!
Everybody else! That's who!

I will blame everyone for thinking I was too fat.

Huh? What?

For the next thirty years....I gained and lost and gained and lost more times than I can count. I am not exaggerating.

Some of the gains were pregnancy induced.

I blame my babies.
But I was always able to lose the weight.

Until I started to homeschool.

THAT'S IT!

I blame the sedentary life of a homeschool mom.

But why aren't all homeschool mom's overweight? Ah yes. It's my parents fault.
I always knew that. They force fed me and called me Booba.


Can you hear my sarcasm? I hope so, because I am being totally facetious.

I believe that food is delicious. I like it.
I have pleased myself by feeding myself what I loved and way too much of it.
I have been lazy.

At some point I needed to acquire self control in the area of eating.
At some point I needed to be in charge of my appetite.

The self-control has come and gone. It is hard to make changes. It is hard to say no.

But as I have mentioned before....

It is hard to be fat and it is hard to diet.

Choose your hard, Donna dear.

Choose wisely.

It's about time.

There is no one to blame.

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Nov. 18, 2010

"A final trick of variety: Since the pleasure of most foods is in the first few bites,
eat one thing on your plate at a time, at least at the start of the meal when you can concentrate
and enjoy the full flavors. The mouthful as melange (blend of foods) defeats the purpose of variety."

~Mireille Guiliano
(French Women Don't Get Fat)


This is really true...and good advice.

I have eaten unconsciously.
I have ignored my hunger.
And I have neglected my taste buds.

I think I am ready to slow down and think about each taste.
That should not be so hard.

I have noticed food losing it's flavor. Especially ice cream.

Starting today, I am going to experiment and try to stop eating as soon as the taste vanishes.

I can't wait to see what happens.


****

My weight stayed the same this week.

I am not depressed, just determined to see the number go down next Tuesday.

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Nov. 14, 2010

I have had my first run in with the holiday eating situations.

My lovely in-laws came to town and we got together twice to eat.

Friday night, I was not hungry when I arrived....but the popcorn had been popped and I did not say NO to my
nose. The thing that happens tho when I eat before I am hungry, is that then the hunger doesn't come around by the time the meal is served. So I ate dinner because it was time to eat and not because I was hungry.

I made good choices and took small portions of the food that I did eat.
I drank water and did not have seconds.

So I am not beating myself up about it too much. A slip.

Until Saturday night when we met again for dinner.

This time I was hungry.

And I over ate.
A few too many crackers with cheese and salami. (Definitely didn't even consider the contents of the salami)
A little bit too much chili. (White chili with beans. Very good. Got the recipe.)

But the kicker was I drank some Sierra mist with cranberry. It was made from sugar. I was thirsty.
I was weak. I drank about 16 oz.

This sugary drink is what made my tummy feel full and icky.

Boo.

Thanksgiving is coming up.
We will be traveling.

I have run the first leg of the holiday relay.
My results were not impressive. Today and tomorrow I will be extremely careful when I eat...and what I eat.
Hopefully I will still have good news on the scale on Tuesday morning.


So far today I am listening to my tummy.
(That's the thing I love about listening to your hunger. There is always the next meal that you can wait for...and succeed in waiting for hunger.)

I CAN do this.

I do not want my ankles to swell back up and I really love that my shirts close over my tummy.

Thursday, November 11, 2010

Nov. 11, 2010

This just in:

My feet are getting smaller.

I just tried on a pair of shoes that two months ago felt snug. And they slipped on quite easily.
This made me very happy.

In Sept. my son told me I had cankles.
That was the first time I had been told that, even if I had noticed swelling in my ankles in the last year....
no one was sweet enough to point it out. Until Matthew did.

So today, my ankles seem to be shrinking.

My shoes feel nice and roomy.

It's a good day to be my feet.

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Nov. 9, 2010

I am really hungry. It is 9:45 in the morning.
I had a Iced Grande Nonfat Chai at 8:00.

My body is already calling for fuel.

Three weeks ago, I wouldn't have thought this was possible. The wait for hunger seemed very long.
I wouldn't be hungry at 'dinner time". I would finally get hungry at 9:00 pm.
That, to me, is pretty weird. I don't want to eat at nine o'clock at night.
But I realized that I was eating way past full at lunch time so my body had plenty of food to last well into the night.

The last two weeks I have been pushing food away. I have been eating slower and noticing when I am full.
This for me is harder than waiting for hunger. The full feeling feels like it comes very quickly.
(My mouth is not ready to stop chewing yet.)

Yes. I like to chew for a long time. I like my food to last.
This longing to chew is fading and for that I am grateful.

I still eat my bagel every morning because it is substantial to me.
Two eggs, sunny side up with one piece of toast is gone in a flash with very little chewing necessary.
I can be done with eggs and a piece of toast in three minutes.

A bagel, now that is more like it. I get to chomp on it for at least five minutes.
I feel like I have eaten. It registers in my mind as something solid and satisfying.


But, thankfully, as I eat less, I get to eat more often. And that is nice. I am closer to the family schedule.
(Except when I am ravenous by 4:00 in the afternoon and eat BEFORE everyone else :o) )

It has taken me two months, but I feel good.
I feel free.

I am less in love with food and eating than I was a month ago.
There has been a change. It feels normal. It feels natural. It feels wonderful.
It's my favorite way to lose weight.



Two month weigh in this morning;

Total lost -10

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Nov. 7, 2010

Sometimes you just have to go out to eat where you don't really want to go out to eat.

Last night I told my husband to choose where he wanted to go out to eat.
He chose a place called Five Guys. He has been wanting to go to this hamburger joint for a year and we always forget to
about it. Well, yesterday, he remembered.

I didn't complain. I would be fine.
If I waited for hunger and ate only until I felt full, I would be okay.

So I ordered a hamburger and Cajun fries and a glass of water.

A glass of water was the best part of the meal.

The hamburger came and it was a double. It was so large I really could barely bite into it.

The flavor was average. I took off one of the patties and ate the burger. With one sniff of the fries, I was suspect.
They smelled very strong and not very good.

I ate one fry and did not like it. I tried a second and closed up the bag.

While I hate to waste food, there is no way I am putting icky tasting fried food in my mouth.
It was a very easy decision.

My husband, being the thin eater that he is, didn't care for the double burger either, and he did not like his regular fries.
He did not eat his fries. He doesn't have food issues. This was not a big deal to him. He turns down food
with ease. It is no wonder that he has never struggled with his weight at all. He does not eat healthy, but he certainly listens to hunger and fullness.


We won't go back to Five Guys to eat, ever again.

I went to a pub (Jac's) last Wednesday that had grass fed beef in their hamburgers.
It was delicious!
I hope I can convince Patrick to go with me and try one.

Tuesdays are two for the price of one.

Doesn't that sound like a good plan?

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Nov. 4, 2010

When you weigh as much as I do, losing eight pounds doesn't show to those around you.
But that is really okay with me because I can see it.
My blouses close over my tummy.
My face does not look as round and bloated to me.

And last night, I soaked my feet in some sweet smelling oil and water and even applied some extra oil to my
needy little feet.

Eight pounds in two months is a small victory but the feeling I have in my spirit is wonderful.

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Nov. 2, 2010

"Food choices are not all that complicated-you do just need to eat less,
move more, eat lots of fruits and vegetables,
and go easy on the junk food."

-Marion Nestle

Better Nutritional Value:

Vegetables and fruits
Nuts, seeds beans
Whole grains with fiber
Lean meats, poultry, fish, eggs (in moderation)
Low-fat dairy
Unprocessed or minimally processed foods

Poorer Nutritional Value

Foods with added sugars
Foods with added saturated and trans fats
Refined grains
High-fat meats and cold cuts
Whole milk and whole milk foods
Highly processed foods.


This from the book "What to Eat" by Marion Nestle


****

I admire the simplicity.

I am not a fan of complicated. I have a book called the Schwarzbein Principle. Her advice is very sound...but she had me counting grams and it was just too hard. I really couldn't figure it out.

I like straight forward.

*****

Lost two pounds this week.
Total of -8

I'm delighted to lose weight after a long weekend of traveling.

Monday, November 1, 2010

Nov. 1, 2010

Virtue —even attempted virtue— brings light; indulgence brings fog —C.S. Lewis


This quote came thru on my Twitter account on Sunday. I immediately thought of how this applied to my unhealthy overeating.

In my life, indulgence really did bring fog.

I was lost and wandering around. I wasn't seeing clearly.
It was dreary.

Taking food off it's pedestal has been a real lightening.

I can not say that I am or feel virtuous.
That word is too high for me to apply to this situation.

But the coming out of the fog due to attempting to put eating in it's proper place.
That is and feels good.



***


DSC_0279

I have no interest in the candy this year. In the past years I bought bags of Butterfingers and ate them one by one before Halloween. Then I went out to buy more to give away.

This year I did not do this.

Katie got loads of candy. I put it in a bowl on the piano. It looks so festive.

Yet. I am unmoved.


My head is clear and I am content.
Listening to my body for signals of hunger is freeing.

I am going to have a good weigh in tomorrow. I can't wait.